What’s the deal with the rubber clogs? Okay, so I can understand that the Aussie sheepskin Uggs that I saw back in Cali were popular for their cozy comfort and casual style which developed a bit of a cult following especially among the yoga crowd. But their rubber cousins, which I have seen on every island, are neon clunkers. They only come in parking cone orange, jaundice yellow, and pepto-bismol pink. The rubber is thick and heavy, looking like they were cut right from the tires of 18 wheelers. They’re the steel toed boots of beach sandals. They neither flip nor flop, more like a thunk with each step. They’re usually seen on tourists near the coast. But they couldn’t possibly be good for the beach because they’d act like anchors in the sand. You can’t even blame the tree huggers for this one because they’re not environmentally friendly; I saw one sitting at the bottom of Trellis Bay and even the fish stayed away from it.

If you have a friend suffering from this affliction, intervene and show them the mirror. This must be stopped before it spreads like bird flu.